


The (After) Life of the Party

by Kioee



Category: Yu-Gi-Oh! Duel Monsters (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Detectives, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Fake/Pretend Relationship, M/M, Medium Joey Wheeler, Vampire Kaiba Seto, Violetshipping Secret Santa 2020, Yugi and Pegasus and Téa also make appearances
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 19:27:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28212396
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kioee/pseuds/Kioee
Summary: Seto Kaiba is a vampire who drinks blood out of a coffee cup. Joey Wheeler is a medium who's afraid of ghosts. These two Vice detectives must go undercover to stop a demon in the body of a wedding planner.
Relationships: Jounouchi Katsuya | Joey Wheeler/Kaiba Seto
Comments: 7
Kudos: 50





	The (After) Life of the Party

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Alecto](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alecto/gifts).



> For the Violetshipping Discord Secret Santa 2020
> 
> Prompts used: AUs, fantasy/supernatural elements, fake dating

The monotony of his job was unbearable. A mugging here, a burglary there. Throw in the occasional vampire attack and Seto Kaiba wanted to end his own immortal existence. Seto’s clear talent was geared for Cyber Crimes, but the police chief kept his sour attitude over their last disagreement. He hadn’t meant to imply that the chief was a spineless coward, no matter how true. So it was that Seto was stuck in Vice as retaliation with the double punishment of being forced to work with the most insufferable partner to ever grace the Domino Police Department.

Joey Wheeler could have been a gifted medium if he ever took the time to work on his talents. However, the guy was downright scared of ghosts. He could tussle with tulpas, wrestle with warlocks, and beat up Bigfoot, but god forbid he go up against a ghost. Having a medium with any sort of skill could be a fantastic addition to Homicide, but instead the idiot decided to use his fists instead of his brain and joined Vice.

The offending partner sat at his desk in their joint cubicle, offering Seto a coffee. “You look like you had a hard night.”

Seto sneered. “You know I don’t sleep.” He eyed the black liquid. “Or drink coffee.”

Joey just laughed. “Wrong cup.” He handed Seto the other cup. Inside, red liquid swirled around. “AB neg, just like you like it.”

With a snort, Seto took the cup and drank. “Thank you,” he said.

“You don’t have to sound so constipated about it.”

“Just shut up and look over the files,” Seto snapped.

Joey rolled his eyes. “Whatever. How old are you again? Four-hundred? I think your old age has made you cranky.”

Seto gritted his teeth. “Wheeler, I swear if you don’t shut up, I’m going to--”

A file slapped in the middle of their desks. The two of them looked up to see Lieutenant Gardner. “Will. You two. Stop,” she said through gritted teeth.

“Hey, Téa,” Joey said, sheepishly.

Seto picked up the file. “What is this?”

The lieutenant just smiled. “New case. Top priority.” She turned to leave, waving as she walked away.

Joey frowned. “Strange. She usually goes over the case details. Lemme see,” he said as he tried to grab the file from Seto’s hand. Seto held it out of reach and Joey leaned over the desk to try and reach it.

“Sit down, idiot.” He slapped the file on the desk, keeping his hand firm on the cover. Joey had no hope to make him budge, vampiric strength coming in handy. “This is important. Shut up and just look at it.”

Joey nodded and sat back down properly in his seat. Seto slowly opened the file. Joey’s eyes flicked from the page to Seto. “Seriously?” he whispered.

Seto nodded before closing the file over the page that read “UNDERCOVER. SEE CHIEF.”

\---

The chief’s office was so extravagant that it had started rumors that the chief used police funds to decorate. Seto would have loved to see him go down, but it turned out the man just had an inheritance that he liked to burn through on frivolous things. He was in his dress uniform at all times and sat at an ornate chair drinking from wine glasses. It was blood of course, but it was unprofessional. How on earth Maximillion Pegasus got to be Chief of Police would scorn Seto for the rest of his undying days.

They closed the door behind them and Pegasus waved them in. “Boys! Hello! Thank you for coming so quickly!”

Seto gritted his teeth, but Joey grinned and spoke before he could say anything. “Hey, Chief! What’s the case?”

“I am so glad you asked, Joey. Please, boys, take a seat.” Seto wanted to wipe the smug look of Pegasus’ face, but he needed to know the details, so he elected to sit.

“So, we think we’ve got a demon on our hands.” Pegasus held a serious face. All traces of glee and silliness wiped away. Seto shifted in his seat, paying closer attention. He saw Joey’s eyebrows raise, that flicker of fear passing over his features.

“A demon?” Joey asked, an almost imperceptible quiver in his voice.

“Yes,” replied Pegasus. “Kidnappings. We’ve narrowed it down to one entity. We believe he’s been possessing a wedding planner named Ryou Bakura. All of the targets have been humans engaged to non-humans. Vamps, werewolves, what have you.”

Seto eyed Pegasus warily. “And what do we need to do for our undercover assignment?”

“How do you feel about picking out china patterns?”

\---

The two of them walked into Bakura’s shop. The disguises were good. Seto could barely tell what they really looked like, and they had extra magic warding thanks to the department’s consulting witch, Yugi. If only Joey could hold his composure. He kept looking around, eyes darting like he was under interrogation. 

“Knock it off,” Seto hissed under his breath, elbowing Joey in the sides.

“Sorry, jeeze, you don’t gotta injure a guy.”

“Just remember what we’re doing.”

Joey frowned. “I know. I know. Hey, since we’re on the subject, be nicer to me. We’re supposed to be in love here.”

“Hello!” came a bright and cheery voice. From the back room came Bakura. Or at least his possessed body. From what they’d seen of their research, this demon was excellent at masking himself as his host. If they didn’t already know this guy was possessed, they may never have guessed.

“Hi there,” said Seto, putting on a slight French accent to disguise his voice. “I’m Kenji and this is my fiance Jake. We saw your reviews and my fiance and I are interested in your services.”

“Oh, congratulations!” Bakura said, clapping his hands together. “When’s the big day?”

“July fourteenth,” Joey piped up. His own toned-down accent was passable enough.

“Oh! A summer wedding! How lovely.” He flipped through some books. “If there are certain flowers or foods you like that aren’t in season during that time, it would be extra, but we can talk in detail later.”

With a smile, he continued, “What do you two do for a living? I like to get a feel for who my clients are to create the best atmosphere for your wedding.”

“Well,” began Seto. “I’m a textbook editor, though I pick up some freelance work from time to time.” He smiled. “I remember when McGraw-Hill was founded back in the late 1800s.” He looked over at Joey with a smile. “And my fiance is a mechanic. Goes back in his family three generations.” 

Joey smiled and wrapped an arm around Seto’s waist, pulling him close. Seto let himself, hiding his discomfort with the too familiar tough. “We found out my grandpa worked on one of Ken’s old cars from around that time. Felt like fate.” Seto smiled at Joey. He may be an idiot sometimes, but he was a good backup for something like this.

Bakura glanced at the clock. “Oh dear, I have a client coming for a meeting in a few. Here,” Bakura said, handing the two of them brochures and packets. “Look through these materials, and come back, say tomorrow around two, and we can get to work.”

They made it back to their apartment. The department supplied them with a one bedroom to make them look more like a married couple. Seto had tried to argue that as a vampire he could, and did, have enough money saved up to spend on a bigger place. He suspected it was all part of a big joke to everyone else.

Joey looked around the place. It didn’t look like he was that thrilled with it either. “I think someone died here.”

“Given the part of town we’re in, I wouldn’t be surprised,” Seto replied. 

“Ugh. Over there by the fridge even.” Joey looked disgusted. “Wonder if he died trying to get food.”

“If you were a better medium, you could probably figure it out.”

“No way, Kaiba.” Joey shook his head fervently. “Knowing my luck that ghost would be pissed about not getting his last meal and take it out on me.”

Seto rolled his eyes. “I’ve watched you put a werewolf in handcuffs on the full moon, and you’re afraid of spirits.”

“Ghosts just creep me out, okay.” He huffed. “You don’t have to be a jerk about it.” Tossing his jacket on a kitchen chair, he snatched the packets from Seto’s hands. “Think there’s anything in here that can help us figure out where to find the missing vics?”

“If they’re even alive,” Seto replied as he sat at the table.

“Hey, don’t talk like that.”

“It’s a demon, Wheeler. What use could he have for keeping them alive?”

Joey shrugged. “It’s a demon. Maybe there’s a ritual and he needs a certain number of humans to complete it,” he said as he opened the door of the refrigerator. “Aw, crap, there’s nothing in here.”

“You make a good point,” Seto said. He hated it when Joey made good points. He couldn’t figure out the crossword answer to the clue “Arthur Conan ____” the other day, but the way he made connections in cases and the motivations behind them was a stronger point. It made it harder to argue he shouldn’t have a partner. Joey was, unfortunately, a competent detective. Not to mention, he was better at talking to victims.

“Yeah, well again, we don’t have any food,” Joey complained and Seto sighed. One track mind, that idiot. “Let’s go out to the shops.”

“You’re the one that’s hungry. You go.” Seto thumbed through one of the brochures, figuring Joey also had a point about seeing if anything in the materials could be a clue.

“There’s no blood here, either, and you certainly ain’t gonna snack on me.” Joey shut the refrigerator door and stood in front of Seto. “Come on. We’ll convince the neighborhood that we’re just a nice couple going grocery shopping.”

Seto sighed. “Fine. I guess we should take a look around to see if there’s any other activity in the neighborhood that can give us insight into what’s going on.”

Going to an actual store to get his blood supply was something he hadn’t had to ever do. He always had people deliver it to him. He was out of his element and resigned to following Joey around the place while he chattered about sales and discounts. He let his mind wander, thinking about the case. If it was a ritual, what kind? Were the victims dead either way? 

He was taken out of his thoughts, feeling Joey’s arm wrap around his. “What do you think, honey?” 

Seto’s eyes flicked to the attention of the clerk at the blood counter. “Yes, that’s fine, dear.” He had no idea what he’d just agreed to. He wasn’t used to being touched and so far, Joey had held him so casually twice today. It was for their cover, but it was so foreign yet so easy to fall into. Seto picked up his other hand and placed it over Joey’s. “I trust you.” The hitch in his breath was barely perceptible, but he was sure the clerk could hear it. Maybe less so, the way his pulse quickened. Strange. It was just his simple words to keep up appearances.

“Sorry about not having any AB negative,” the clerk said. “That stuff is a bitch to get.”

He thought of the cup Joey had given him that morning and something stirred in him. 

\---

Once they were back in the apartment, groceries put away, the two of them poured over the materials from the shop. “Wait,” Joey said, holding onto one in particular.

“What is it?”

“There’s something _off_ about this one.”

Seto snorted. “We’re going to need more than just ‘off.’”

“I know, I know. We should get it to Yugi. I think there’s some magic on it.”

Seto eyed Joey. “I didn’t know mediums could detect magic.”

“Soul magic.”

“Ah,” Seto replied as he dropped the brochure. “That doesn’t bode well for our victims then.” Seto frowned. “He might use it to mark the victims in some way.” His eyes flicked up to Joey.

“Ah, shit.”

“Yeah.”

Joey shrugged. “I guess this is part of what we needed to do.”

“Can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.”

“Where did you get the blood this morning?”

Joey leaned back and shrugged, looking at the window. “I just got it from the coffee guy.” He was lying.

“He just happened to have AB negative on hand?” Seto raised an eyebrow.

Joey shifted in his seat. “Okay listen, and you can’t tell anyone.” Seto nodded. “I pay him to keep some aside so you can have a cup of it every morning. I know it’s your favorite and I know it’s in high demand.”

Seto frowned. “That’s nice of you.”

Joey laughed. “Don’t look so upset about it.”

“Why?”

Joey stopped laughing. “Huh?”

“Why do you bother?” Seto prompted. “It’s not like I can’t get by with a different type. Why go to the trouble of bribing the coffee guy just to cater to my preference?”

Joey shifted in his seat. “Look I just liked doing something nice for you. It always puts you in a better mood--”

“Oh so it makes me more tolerable for you to be around,” Seto said and nodded, mystery having been solved.

“No!” Joey said. “Well, yes it does, but that’s not it. I just wanted you to have a nice start to your day is all. It was for you.” He frowned. “I can deal with you being a sourpuss just fine. Thought maybe you enjoyed your day a little better when you had something nice to start it off.”

Seto stared at Joey. “Thank you then,” he said. “I won’t tell anyone about your arrangement.” He paused. “Is there anything I can do that would make your days easier?”

Joey brushed him off. “Just seeing your smiling mug is enough to brighten my day.”

Seto let out a short laugh. “Sure.”

“Hey, so is one of us taking the couch, or are we stuck sharing the same bed tonight?” Joey asked with a laugh.

Seto raised an eyebrow. “I don’t sleep.”

“Oh, right,” he said, and if Seto didn’t know better, he’d say he looked a little disappointed.

\---

Joey’s eyes fluttered open. Once he took in the sight of Seto standing by the bed he kicked around and fell off the bed. Seto snickered. 

“Okay, Edward Cullen, how long were you standing there watching me sleep?” He stood up, regaining his composure. Of course, if he wasn’t in just his boxers, he’d probably be a more convincing threat.

“I actually just walked in right before you woke up. I could hear you waking up.”

“Weird.”

“Anyway,” Seto said. “Let’s go over the brochures and come up with something to tell Bakura to sound like we’re actually planning a wedding.” He gestured to the door to allow Joey to walk out first. “We have three hours. You really sleep in with no alarm clock, huh?”

Joey grimaced. “Whatever. Let me put on pants.”

Joey came out of the bedroom with a pair of sweatpants that hung low on his hips. Despite having just seen him in less clothing, Seto couldn’t help but find this look more enticing. He frowned at the thought. Joey being enticing at all was annoying.

Instead of ruminating on it, Seto insisted on spending their time drilling the details of their cover into each other until it was down pat. Their wedding colors centered around violet. Their wedding flower was snapdragon. They wanted to have poker tables at their reception. Details about family and friends who would be invited started to flow more naturally. Seto smiled. They could really pull this off.

\---

It was 2:00 p.m on the dot when they walked back into Bakura’s shop. They brought back some of the brochures he had given them with some things circled or notes written on them. Bakura greeted them with a bright smile. “Let’s get started, shall we?”

They walked to the back. Seto could hear Joey’s heartbeat increase. He couldn’t blame him for being nervous. At this point he was bait for a demon. Seto put a hand on Joey’s shoulder, hoping the touch would be reassuring and grounding. Joey looked over at him and smiled. It didn’t slow his heart rate but he looked more at ease.

“So,” Bakura said as they sat down. “How did the two of you meet?”

Seto smiled, trying to think of something. That was the one thing they hadn’t covered. Before he could come up with a lie, Joey started speaking.

“It’s a funny story, really,” he began. Seto would steel himself for whatever Joey threw at him, hoping he could bounce off it in the right places. Like a story they might have told a hundred times whenever anyone asked. “We were both at this little diner. Twenty-four hour, makes food just like your grandma kind of deal.” 

Seto turned his head to look at Joey. This was the truth. That wasn’t something he’d considered going for in this situation. “I had realized I was working a straight forty-eight hours and had probably been a little longer since my last meal and I was out of blood at home,” he added.

“The only diner in a five mile radius that had any on the menu,” Joey said. “What are the chances, right?”

Bakura smiled. “Oh, that’s definitely fate.”

“The place was going through some renovations,” Joey continued. “So there were only these two tables next to each other.”

“I was going to get my order to go, but they had an issue with the lock on their blood storage so I had to sit and wait for a while.” He looked at Joey. “This one is very friendly and wouldn’t shut up.”

That earned a chuckle from Bakura, and Joey looked away sheepishly. “I was kind of nervous to be sitting next to someone so handsome,” he said. He looked back up. “Seriously, I thought you had to be a model or something.”

“Is that the line you used?” Bakura said with a laugh.

Joey laughed back, a little more embarrassed. “I asked him if he came there often.”

Seto froze for a moment, but managed to let out a warm laugh. “I don’t think I realized he was trying to flirt with me.” He paused. “And we ended up talking for quite a while.”

“He wasn’t picking up on any of my hints, so I just figured he wasn’t interested,” Joey added with a little too much honesty. “But I thought I’d give it one more shot and ask if I could walk him home.”

Seto smiled. “And I laughed at him because why would a vampire need a human to escort him anywhere.”

“But you did say yes,” Joey said with a cheeky grin.

“I humored him,” Seto agreed, still smiling.

“And then as he was walking back to his place, I realize it’s the same way as mine.”

“We’d been living in the same building for a few weeks and had never run into each other.” Seto looked at Joey, who was practically beaming. “Funny how things work out.”

Joey made eye contact with Seto. “Yeah, it was pretty much love at first sight for me,” he said.

Seto thought about that night, and about them becoming partners at the precinct, about Joey bribing the coffee guy to have his favorite blood type always on hand, about every time he invaded his space or smiled at him. Huh. Maybe this was a lot more real than Seto had anticipated. “It took me a little more than first sight, but I came around.” He held Joey’s hand in his.

Bakura smiled even wider. “It’s so nice to see a couple so in love.” 

It happened faster than even Seto could perceive it. In a flash of red light, Bakura transported them to an alleyway. Lined up against the brick wall were five boxes, four of them closed. So far four people had been kidnapped. Whatever demon Bakura had planned, he was going to use Joey as his fifth.

“Get help!” yelled Joey as he pulled a demon binding chain from his coat and got it around Bakura.

“Are you sure you can--?” Seto began but Joey cut him off.

“I can’t hold him forever! Go!”

Seto moved faster than he had in his un-life. He made it out of the alley and finally to an area with cell service. He called the department and got connected to the magic unit and Yugi. “Send me an anti-possession spell right now!”

“Is everything alright?”

“Does it sound alright, Yugi?” Seto didn’t have time to argue. “Spell, now!”

He heard Yugi shuffle. “Texting it to you now. You must be able to see the demon clearly and you need to recite the entire incantation without interruption or being noticed by the demon.”

“What?” He growled. “That’s ridiculous. What kind of magic works like that?”

“I didn’t make up the way magic works, Kaiba,” Yugi said.

“Fine!” He said, hanging up the call, grateful the text had gone through. He made his way back toward the alleyway. His heightened senses keeping an eye out for places nearby he could hide while speaking and not be noticed. He got a quick look at a window that overlooked the alleyway and made his way to it.

The occupant of the apartment didn’t like her cocaine weighing being interrupted, but a flash of Seto’s police badge was a good enough argument to get her to clear out. He made his way to the window and looked out. Joey was out of Bakura’s grip and the chain had stuck to the demon. That would dampen his powers enough to keep him from teleporting any more, but it was clear his inhuman strength was intact. A right hook straight to Joey’s face sent him flying.

Seto winced, but Joey stood up like it was nothing. A glance to his left and he dashed, picking up a sledgehammer. He swung at Bakura with enough force and surprise to knock him back. It was a good weapon, but Bakura still had the upper hand, managing to dodge most of the hits and land more than enough of his own. Seto had to work fast, and it was a long spell.

Seto quickly recited the incantation. He had to stay focused on that or else this would all be for nothing. Still, the sight of Joey struggling against the demon, all the hits he took, was difficult. Joey was human. He was fragile, and Seto could do nothing to protect him. But he could keep reciting the incantation and banish the demon from this body, and hopefully he could do it before Joey got seriously hurt.

Bakura landed a nasty hit on Joey’s head and Seto choked on his words, before continuing. He couldn’t reveal himself or they’d both end up dead. He watched as Bakura hovered over Joey, seemingly evaluating his body. He then swung the hammer up. Panic spread through Seto as he finished the incantation just in time. 

The hammer dropped behind Bakura, sliding out of the hands raised above his head. His body convulsed and dropped to his knees. A flash of red light surrounded the body before shooting into the sky. Seto hadn’t performed an exorcism before, but that was textbook how it was described in the manual.

He finally ran out of his hiding place, running to Joey’s body. The lump on his head was nasty, but he was breathing normally and he could hear Joey’s pulse, strong and stubborn as ever. Seto pulled out his phone to call an ambulance, almost forgetting to report that they needed to pick up two unconscious bodies. The real Bakura laid limp on the ground, no mark on him but the regular signs of life were there as well.

\---

In the days after, the hospital staff eyed Seto suspiciously as he sat by Joey’s bedside. The days when vampires regularly stole from hospitals was long gone but the uneasiness never went away. Seto just scoffed. He was a goddamn officer of the law. As if he needed to scrounge hospitals to get a meal.

A shift in Joey’s breathing snapped Seto’s attention back to what was important. Joey shifted in the bed, sitting up. “Hey, Kaiba,” he said weakly. “How long have you been sitting there?”

“Since you’ve been in here.”

“Oh.” He grinned. “That’s pretty sentimental of you.”

“Shut up.”

“So you’d be okay if we were stuck sleeping in one bed?”

“I don’t sleep,” Seto reminded before kissing him.


End file.
